I am coming to the end of a project that’s consumed me for at least seven years (27 if you’re really counting), and am aware of a huge block, a physical weight almost, I can feel on top of me. I’ve been aware of it for years, in fact, and know it’s the only real reason I can’t finish it - not a lack of research, or commitment, or dedication, or even words (I’ve written millions).
I came across this which seems to sum it up.
There are few writers of value who do not approach the end of a long project with at least some sense of dread, a self-lacerating concession that the book is not so much finished as abandoned and that positively everyone will see all the holes that are surely there, all the illogic, the shortcuts, the tape, the glue. Finishing is more about terror than about exhilaration. In a way, it is like beginning.
- David Remnick, 1997 review of Big Trouble by J. Anthony Lukas
I almost didn’t post this quote, as it said “writers of value” and I’m not one of those, but that’s it - that’s it exactly.